You are going to be responsible for traumas in your child’s life.
That does not mean that you are a bad parent. That does not mean that you are making too many mistakes. That does not mean that you are responsible for anything that your child does as they grow older.
But parenting is extremely difficult, and – no matter how many books you’ve read or how much you’ve prepared – you’re going to do something wrong.
Children Are Always Listening and Observing
One critical thing to remember with young children is that they are always learning. Even in moments where they’re facing the other way or playing with their siblings, they’re hearing, seeing, and processing things that you may not even realize they can see.
And, as parents, we show things that we do not always want to show. We get angrier than we want to. We have spats with our partners that we do not have to have. We show our love and affection in ways that are good for us, but may not be received well for them. We even have beliefs about things like religion, identity, and lifestyles that are fine for us now, but incongruent with what the future holds for our kids.
And that’s why no parent can be expected to be perfect, because even perfect parenting may not be ideal for the society and future that your child has for themselves. You can make all the smart decisions you want. But times change, people change, personalities are different – the way that you are now is not going to be 100% correct as a parent for the way that life changes for your child.
What Can You Do?
As parents, the best thing we can do is look for ways to work on the things we can change for ourselves that will benefit both us and our children. For example, your child picks up on your fears. If you have any irrational worries, addressing those worries can support your ability to not only help ensure your child isn’t learning from your habits, but also improve your quality of life and happiness as well.
If you ever notice that your child has behaviors that you’re concerned about, early intervention can also be very impactful. It helps to teach your child skills they can use to address the emotions and behaviors that you already see, no matter your role in them,
You can’t prevent yourself from making mistakes. What you can do is put yourself in the best position to model happy, engaged, energized behaviors and be the parent that you want to be. You’re parenting wrong. But you can make sure that you’re in a position to do your best.
Get help with parenting and childhood behavioral challenges by contacting Right Path Counseling, today.