Many children, if not most, start out as picky eaters. They have an evolving palate and are overwhelmed by their senses, which makes them prone to avoiding foods with odd textures, tastes – even colors and shapes.
Picky eating is normal. But it can also be challenging as a parent. Your child is at a stage where they need as many nutrients as possible, and so their picky eating can feel problematic, because it might mean that they’re not getting enough nutrients to thrive. In some cases, it may also reflect developmental issues that also need to be addressed.
There is a very fine line between healthy picky eating and picky eating that requires intervention. Speaking to a specialist can help. But it is also a good idea to pay attention to the signs of what is normal and what may not be.
About Picky Eating in Children
Picky eating is a strong preference for certain foods, textures, or colors and/or an aversion to most others. Many children go through “food jags,” where they only want to eat a particular food for a short period, or exhibit fear of new foods, known as neophobia.
The good news is that this is normal but often temporary. These behaviors usually lessen with time as the child’s palate expands and their food preferences diversify. Children should begin to become less picky eaters after the age of 4, but may even stay picky eaters until the age of 9.
Because of that, it is harder to determine when picky eating is normal and when it is not. Rather than focus on the picky eating itself, it is better to focus on the signs and symptoms that picky eating is a problem. For example:
- Growth and Weight Issues – If picky eating is leading to inadequate weight gain or noticeable weight loss, it could be a sign that the child is not receiving enough calories or nutrients. Regular checkups with their pediatrician should help identify problems early.
- Limited Food Variety – Children who restrict themselves to a very limited number of foods, often excluding entire food groups (like vegetables or proteins), may not be meeting essential nutritional needs. This is especially concerning if the child’s diet lacks key nutrients like iron, calcium, or vitamin D. Vitamins can come from strange places, but it is important to know what’s in your child’s foods so you can monitor that they’re getting enough of it.
- Impact on Social and Family Life – If a child’s picky eating habits interfere with family meals, school functions, or social interactions, it may signal a more significant behavioral or sensory issue. In this case, the food itself is only part of the problem – the other part is psychological.
- Physical Symptoms – Some children with selective eating may experience gastrointestinal symptoms like constipation, stomach pain, or acid reflux, which can further complicate their relationship with food. If your child is having stomach issues, that may be a sign that their diet is not what it should be.
It can be difficult to know what is normal development and what isn’t. It may also be a challenge to try to understand when it is deserving of intervention and when it is not. Don’t be afraid to seek out experts when needed.
Causes of Problematic Picky Eating
Picky eating, as a behavior, may be its own problem. Meaning: if your child is too picky an eater in general, they may be restricting their diet too heavily in a way that is causing their mind or body harm. But it may also be caused by other issues, including:
- Sensory Processing Issues
Children with sensory processing challenges may experience heightened sensitivities to the textures, smells, and tastes of foods. For example, a child may avoid foods with specific textures (e.g., mushy or crunchy) or colors. Sensory aversions can make mealtime stressful, and without intervention, they may persist or worsen over time.
- Developmental or Behavioral Disorders
Picky eating is more common in children with certain developmental or behavioral conditions, such as autism spectrum disorder (ASD) or attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). Children with ASD, for instance, may exhibit rigid eating patterns, avoiding certain foods or insisting on repetitive meals. In these cases, picky eating is typically more intense and persistent than in children without such conditions.
- Oral-Motor Difficulties
Some children have oral-motor challenges, meaning they have difficulty chewing, swallowing, or coordinating their mouth muscles effectively. These children may avoid foods that are harder to chew, such as meats or crunchy vegetables, in favor of softer, easier-to-swallow options.
- Nutritional Deficiencies and Medical Conditions
Certain medical conditions, such as iron deficiency or gastrointestinal issues, can lead to selective eating behaviors. For example, iron deficiency anemia can cause a child to lose their appetite, while acid reflux can make eating uncomfortable, leading the child to avoid specific foods or eating altogether.
Supporting Picky Eaters at Home
For most children, picky eating is a phase that can be supported with patience, consistency, and positive reinforcement. Here are some strategies for promoting healthier eating habits:
- Offer a Variety of Foods – Regularly introduce a variety of foods and textures, even if the child initially refuses them. Familiarity with new foods can help increase acceptance over time.
- Encourage Participation in Meals – Involve children in meal planning, shopping, and food preparation to help them feel more connected to their food choices.
- Keep Mealtimes Relaxed – Avoid pressuring children to eat, as it can create negative associations with food. Instead, model healthy eating and praise small efforts to try new foods.
- Set a Routine – Maintaining regular meal and snack times helps establish consistency, which can be reassuring for picky eaters.
- Eat With Them – We lead such busy lives that many of us eat separately from our children. But our children are more likely to eat foods and try foods when you all eat together.
If your child is also struggling with anxiety, ADHD, or other issues, a therapist may be able to help address these to help them become more motivated to eat.
Knowing When to Seek Help
While most children go through phases of selective eating that improve naturally, certain behaviors or symptoms indicate that picky eating may require further evaluation. Monitoring your child’s growth, nutritional intake, and behavioral responses to food can help you determine when to seek guidance from a healthcare professional.
Also, education is important. Knowing when picky eating is typical and when it may be a sign of a deeper issue empowers parents to provide the right support, ensuring their child’s health and development are on track. If you need help with the psychological causes of picky eating, or you need help as a parent to address parental stresses, please reach out to Right Path Counseling, today.
